September 16, 2019

Suddenly I started freezing, I put on my coat. I ordered a coffee. People were dancing. The birthday girl called me to dance. She said I thought I could always count on you for dancing. I said yes you can, always. But not today. I am too tired.

And I was.

Every bit and piece in my body was aching.

I could not stand any more.

I told Fabio I was tired. He imitated me funnily saying “I am tired” hanging his lip lower.???

I felt first angry, then I felt sad. I was feeling bad and he was making fun of me?

I asked for the car key and went to the car. I got in in the backseat and laid down. My heart was pounding like crazy. I was coughing. I lied down, just being. Just letting. I rested. For maybe half an hour maybe 45 minutes maybe 1 hour. I don’t know. I felt better. But not good enough to stay in the party. But good enough to go in and say proper bye.

I went in. I asked Fabio if we could leave. I kissed the birthday girl, kissed the friends goodbye. We drove home for 45 minutes. I did not want to speak.

When we arrived home, I threw myself to bed immediately and slept.

In the morning I was still exhausted, still feeling sick and I had lost my voice.

I told Fabio about how I felt about yesterday. He was sorry. He wanted to cheer me up. He didn’t know I could feel that way.

We went out for breakfast.

It was a beautiful day.

I spent the day resting.

I drank green smoothies with ginger.

I meditated.

I read.

I thought.

I thought about the night before. We had performed the song we wrote in front of all the guests. I felt very excited. My voice cracked. Fabio made mistakes while playing the guitar. But it was all good so. It was great so.

I was proud. I was happy that we took the plunge. And I wanted more.

I liked this song writing.

Fabio did too, I told him a few verses and he quickly composed a melody.

But I was tired, we will do it another day.

After feeling better I could also do some work and it felt very good to be able to work.

It was 10 pm, I was working, Fabio was practicing Ukulele.

The bell rang. I told Fabio that it might be neighbour that was disturbed by the music. Fabio got uncomfortable. I looked for the key for some minutes and finally could open the door. Yes, it was our next door neighbour. Yes, she was disturbed. She was very tired and couldn’t sleep because of the sound.
She said as I know you I thought I just ask you.

She asked me to stop the music. She said she was very tired. She drove for her fathers birthday in the weekend and she was exhausted. She would really need a sleep.

“She asked.”

I said I was so sorry. “We are into music now. We even composed a song. I am practicing guitar, Fabio ukulele. That’s why there is a lot of sound coming from us recently. Sorry we did not notice the time.”

She said I would love to hear you play sometime.

I said let’s do it a time when you don’t need to sleep.

We laughed, we said bye.

Fabio was still feeling bad.

I told him it was okay.

It was actually more than okay. She coming and asking us to stop made a deeper connection. She told me what she was up to and how she felt and I told her what was going on with us and what excited us. We got to know each other a bit better.

It was all because she asked.

And she asked kindly.

How beautiful that was.

What a nice ending to the day.

And a nice reminder for the next days to come: Ask, ask with kindness.

About the author 

Isil Uysal Calvelli

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