September 4, 2019

​Today I read a blog post of Susan Piver about how she does not get things done and she feels disappointed about herself and sad. Then one day she decided to let it go and focus on joy instead. She did the things that gave her joy. I also most of the time look at things I want to do from the perspective of “should” – or what is important.

My writing is important. My walking is important. My dancing is important. I keep on forgetting.

Yesterday I planned to do a lot of things but I did not. Fabio did not feel good. So we spent our time talking and playing.
That is okay.

One topic we talked yesterday was not feeling good enough. And because of this feeling not starting.
This is the most common feeling. A feeling most people who want to create something new, who want to offer something to the world has.

I don’t know where it comes from. But I guess it might have something to do with fear. Fear of making a mistake. Fear of being judged, ridiculed, fear of being rejected.

The hard truth: all of these will happen. When you give something, the other person that takes it gets to call what you give whatever they want. They can call it stupid, useless, waste of time, waste of money…. whatever they want. And you have no control of that.

But it is the same about you going out. You go out today, interact with someone and they might think whatever they want about you. You have no control of that too. What will you do? Not go out at all? Not talk at all? Not interact at all?

How would you feel if you stayed at home, alone, all day, every day?

That would have been tough, if not impossible.

That is the same with whatever you want to do or create. There will be people who will not like it, who will judge you, who will reject your work.

Whatever they will be thinking is out of your control. What will you be thinking?

How will it feel when you create something and give it to the world? How will it change what you think about your abilities? Your competence? Your potential?

What will you be able to do when you deliver what you want to do? What will you have learned having done it? What will you be seeing in the future having gone through that process and having arrived where you are?

I believe you will be changed through doing the work. Having done it will change you. Having done it will enhance your belief of being able to do something new, give something. You will have the insight of how it feels doing this work. You will see the results and you will have he chance to do even better the next time.

Doing will help you with your insecurity.

Let the voice inside of you tell you “You are not good enough”. That is irrelevant. You want to do it, you decided it is good to do it. Now go and do it.

Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.―Dale Carnegie

Here is something nice from Elizabeth Gilbert:

“A friend told me yesterday that she was thinking of taking a writing class. I told her that was fine, but I might be able to save her money, by telling her everything I know about HOW TO WRITE.
So here it is!
My free 10-step Writing Academy:
1) Tell your story TO someone. Pick one person you love or admire or want to connect with, and write the whole thing directly to them —like you’re writing a letter. This will bring forth your natural voice. Whatever you do, do NOT write to a demographic. Ugh. ❤️
2) Start at the beginning of the story, write what happened, and keep going until you get to the end. ❤️
3) Use radically simple sentences. ❤️
4) Don’t worry if it’s good; just finish it. Whether or not your project is good, you’ll be a different person at the end of it, and that’s always worth doing. ❤️
5) Don’t write with the aim of changing anybody’s life. That will lead to heavy, irritating prose. Just share what delights or enrages or fascinates you. If somebody’s life is changed by it, that’s a bonus. ❤️
6) Whenever you can, tell stories instead of explaining stuff. Humans love stories, and we hate having stuff explained to us. Use Jesus as an example: He spoke almost exclusively in parables, and allowed everybody to draw their own lessons from his great storytelling. And he did very well. ❤️
7) Your work doesn’t have to be any particular length, or written for any particular market. It doesn’t have to even be seen by another human being. How and if to publish your work is a problem for another day. For today, just write. ❤️
8 ) Remember that you’ve been doing research your whole life, merely by existing. You are the only expert in your own experience. Embrace this as your supreme qualification.❤️
9) Every writer starts in the same place on Day One: Super excited, and ready for greatness. On Day Two, every writer looks at what she wrote on Day One and hates herself. What separates working writers from non-working writers is that working writers return to their task on Day Three. What gets you there is not pride but mercy. Show yourself forgiveness, for not being good enough. Then keep going❤️
10) Be willing to let it be easy. You might be surprised.

Fabio and I went out for a fresh breath, for change of air and change of mood. We took our playing cards (Uno) with us. We had beer and played. It was nice, we had fun, we came home happy.

The good thing of emotions is that they change. They don’t stay. Nothing stays. Everything changes. If you let them. You can let them. Wonderful things happen if you let them. Everything that happens is wonderful because they happen only once. We are alive just once, we came into the world and we will go. You felt sad, just once, in this way and it will go and tomorrow you will feel something else. You are alive. All the feelings are signs of that. It is to celebrate!

About the author 

Isil Uysal Calvelli

{"email":"Email address invalid","url":"Website address invalid","required":"Required field missing"}