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life work, self work

The gateway to yourself from the hidden closet

 August 8, 2020

By  Isil Uysal Calvelli

Opened my eyes, it is 6 am and I feel terribly tired. The cats seeing me awake start their begging which would last until I give them their long-awaited food. There are still 2 hours for that.

I do not want to get up from my bed. I reach out to my Kindle and read a few chapters from Taleb’s Skin In the Game.

My head burns with all the questions that he makes me ask myself. I need to let it sink.

After 5 minutes of looking at the ceiling, I decide to turn on my computer to check the calendar and emails. Nothing urgent.

I check my Facebook feed, read a beautiful human story in Humans of New York, laugh at the news of about a boar stealing the computer of a man in Berlin, watch a YouTube video of a master coach about how NLP and coaching fit together and then a video about how to do pricing and selling in coaching business. And 20 minutes into the video I wake up and ask myself “What am I doing?” I woke up and wanted to quickly check my calendar and updates before I started with my morning yoga. Before I judge my self - which I would do - I am hit by an insight: I needed mystery, I needed magic, I needed serendipity.

I love life for all the mystery, magic, serendipity I get to experience.

Now in the Corona-times where the social contact is so limited and due to my current work conditions I am more secluded, I miss that part of life.

Mindless web surfing is the way I make up for it.

In theory, I knew that all the habits are a masked form of wisdom. Our being is so wise that it creates the quickest strongest path to fulfill needs. But I never had this “space” between stimulus and response so clear so I acknowledged this wisdom.

Until now.

Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.

Viktor E. Frankl

After this space, I decided to record this moment. I hope it to be a reminder for myself and maybe for you.

You might not find the space right at the first time while you are totally engaged in your habitual act. But you might create a little space in retrospective - when you judge yourself.

Next time you judge yourself keep the thought of “this is my wisdom” with you. See what shows up. See if that creates a space for you to rest.

You don’t have to change how you act, just notice the space, and be there.

The more you notice, the spacious it will get.

And when you have all the space, you will see who you are.

Love,

Işıl

P.S. Here are the links to the content I was mentioning in the post. I did not want to distract you so I give them all together here.

Book: Skin In the Game by Nassim Nicholas Taleb

News: The story of the man running after a boar in the park (naked) from The Independent

Facebook post of Humans of New York

Video: Master Coach Jedi talks about NLP and coaching

Video about Pricing and Selling in Coaching by Something Major Coaching

Isil Uysal Calvelli


If you ask me who I am in one word, I say “Human”If I should do it with two words, I say “Loving Human”. If I am allowed to do it in three words, I say“Loving Creative Human”

I create words, emotions, connections, energy and spaces. 

I do that through coaching, writing, speaking, podcasting and training.

Işıl

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